Broccoli and a Spanking
A guy I know is a DJ on a country music station. I guess it's half DJ, half morning drive time personality. Apparently, he's pretty good. I tell him I keep trying to listen to his show, but every time I turn on his station they're playing that country music again, and I just can't wade through the songs to get to the wacky DJ hijinks that America loves so bad.
Anyway, he says they recently had a "worst parenting moments" call in segment. Had I waded through the country music long enough to hear about it, I may have called to tell this story:
The other day, my middle son Henry, 8, was whining and crying about going out to dinner at a local ice cream shop. They have hot dogs, sandwiches, chips, ice cream, you know...all the things kids hate. Anyway, God bless my son, but he was being a real brat about this. He wanted Wendy's. My mother was a good cook, and we had many fine meals in my home, but I also thought about all the pot roast, stew, and lima beans I endured growing up, and I was ready to explode on Henry's ingratitude. I grabbed him firmly (but not violently) by the shoulders, got all up in his grill, and said in my loud, menacing voice, finger pointed (but not jabbing) at his chest, "Listen, we're going to Burr's!!! If you don't like it, then your freakin' dinner is going to be broccoli and a spanking!!! Is that what you'd rather have?"
He shut up quick and was good for the rest of the night, which surprised me, because that tactic doesn't often work with him. It may have actually been one of my finest parenting moments. I'll admit, I didn't feel bad about it at all. I think it was the "freakin'" that did it.
